I have finally gotten the chance to upload my other fun list. Here it is! (Trust me, these work.)
How to Annoy Someone Who Hates Harry Potter
1. Relate everything they say to the Harry Potter books and/or movies.
2. Say that they look like a Harry Potter character of the opposite gender.
3. Quote Dobby.
4. Hog their computer 24/7 while on an HP website.
5. Read to them whenever they can’t escape (Like when they’re in a car or elevator); if you don’t have the book, recite from memory.
6. Give them Harry Potter merchandise and demand that they treasure it forever.
7. Rewrite their favorite song with Harry Potter lyrics and sing it constantly.
8. Send multiple Harry Potter related e-mails to them with a misleading name.
9. Sing a Sorting Hat song, pretend to forget what comes next, and ask them if they know in a loud voice.
10. Make them play Quidditch with you.
11. Give them and all of their friends Harry Potter names.
12. ... act offended if they don’t know the history of their character.
13. Always speak with a British accent when around them- especially if you’re not from the U.K.
14. Refer to real places as Harry Potter names.
15. …Throw a fit if they don’t use these names.
16. Draw round glasses and lightning bolt scars on all of their pictures and posters in permanent marker.
17. … deny everything…
18. Give them long lectures on how the Prophecy relates to everyday life.
19. Give every room in their house a Harry Potter codename (The living room is now Entrance Hall) and refer to them if they ask you to get something.
20. Change them immediately if they figure out the new name.
21. Constantly ask them if they can see Thestrals too.
22. …Refuse to tell them what a Thestral is.
23. Say “Anything off of the trolley, dear?” in a British accent when offering food.
24. Pretend that you can do magic, and demonstrate this often.
25. Constantly rearrange their furniture and blame it on indecisive house elves.
26. Yell “Get away Death Eater!” when they come near you.
27. Constantly compare them to Mrs. Figg.
28. … laugh evilly when they ask who Mrs. Figg is.
29. If they ask for advice, say “Three turns should do it” in a serious voice.
30. Complain loudly that their pictures don’t move.
31. Break any awkward silences by saying “How about them Chudley Cannons?”
32. Tell them a random Harry Potter joke.
33. Use a book quote as a punch line for the joke, and then laugh hysterically.
34. ...make sure the joke isn't funny.
35. Use the titles "You-Know-Who" and "He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named" to refer to random people when talking to them.
36. ... make sure that no one knows who you're talking about.
37. Write letters to people (friends, neighbors, politicians) and ask them to join S.P.E.W., and ask them to correct it for you.
38. ...hand fliers out to random passerby, and tell them that they need to “join the cause.”
39. Ask them if you should report Dumbledore's death to your local authorities.
40. Call them often asking if Percy Weasley is there and hang up before they can reply.
41. Pop up in place you're not supposed to be and insist that you were Apparating.
42. When you're late for something, blame it on your broken Time Turner.
43. Deck yourself out in your Harry Potter gear when you know you'll be going to a public place with them.
44. Sing “Weasley is our King” to them constantly.
45. Walk past a wall over and over again, stopping randomly to bang on. When you receive weird stares, shout, "What?! I'm looking for the Room of Requirement!"
46. Every time you see them, demand an explanation of why they don't like Harry Potter.
47. Play the soundtracks while they're stuck in your car.
48. ...add commentary. (Oh, this is where they...)
49. When one of the movies is on TV, call to remind them.
50. If they ask for your phone number, tell them it's 6-2-4-4-2.
51. Say "Alohomora!" every time you open a door.
52. Sort every person you meet into one of the four Houses, and ask them what they think.
53. “Sort” that person into Hufflepuff.
54. Follow them around while acting out a scene from the book doing very annoying voices for all the characters. Ask them to join in, and act offended when they don't.
55. Count down to some obscure Harry Potter event like when it's Dumbledore's birthday, or when a Harry Potter DVD comes out. Keep saying: “87, 86, 85, etc. more days!” in the middle of every conversation.
56. …Smile when they ask why you're counting down.
57. Start talking about a dead character and suddenly burst into hysterical tears.
58. …Refuse to be comforted.
59. Ask them to help you study for your O.W.L's and N.E.W.T's.
60. Knit them hats and insist that you're just trying to liberate them.
61. Talk to their pets and insist that they're Animagi.
62. Treat them to lunch and then tell them that you can't pay for it, because the restaurant doesn't accept Galleons, Sickles, or Knuts.
63. Run up to random men with long, dark hair and scream, "SIRIUS! I always knew you were alive!" while in public with them.
64. Point at electronic devices and say, "Oh, the things Muggles come up with!"
65. Write letters to the editor of your local newspaper about the evils of our society (Namely, Death Eaters and discrimination against friendly werewolves), ask them to help or for advice.
66. Send them numerous letters informing them that they’ve been accepted to Hogwarts (and make a big deal of it when in conversation.)
67. Carry around a shiny rock and tell everyone that it’s the Sorcerer's Stone.
68. Say everything in a sing-song voice like Luna Lovegood.
69. End every conversation and/or letter with "Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!"
70. Tap all brick walls you encounter with an umbrella, when you can’t get it to open, ask them to.
71. Say "Lumos" when turning on a light.
72. Point and grunt and insist that you're speaking Troll.
73. Refuse to wash your hair and explain that you're going for the “Snape look”.
74. Spend hours at a time trying to get your broom to fly in their company.
75. Invite them over for the night and force them to watch all the movies with you.
76. When they leave the room, restart the movie and tell them it's the Time Turner scene.
77. Shriek loudly and insist that you're speaking Mermish.
78. If they ask you to retrieve something, shout "Accio!" loudly.
79. ...when this doesn't work, throw a fit.
80. Demand to know exactly what the function of a rubber duck is.
81. Talk like Hagrid.
82. Point to their garden gnome and say, "Silly Muggles don't have a clue about what gnomes look like!" in a very loud voice.
83. Take them to a CD store and make them help you look for the newest Weird Sisters album.
84. Yell "Avada Kedavra" anytime they give the anti-HP lecture, then fake excruciating pain as your soul rips in two.
85. Write "Enemies of the Heir, BEWARE!" in red paint on their wall.
86. When confronted about the message, refuse to take responsibility and/or explain it further.
87. Hum Hedwig's Theme constantly and be sure to include any crescendos, decrescendos, accents, etc.
88. Write a petition to have Hedwig's Theme become the new National Anthem. Ask them to sign it.
89. Wear all black and explain that you're in mourning over the death of "The Only One He Ever Feared."
90. ...when asked for an explanation of this cryptic title, cry hysterically.
91. Replace their entire movie collection with the Harry Potter films.
92. If they ask you about the weather, say, "Mars is bright tonight."
93. Insist that they subscribe for your new Harry Potter newsletter and when they say no, act like you've been seriously offended.
94. Make them watch Potter Puppet Pals or A Very Potter Musical with you on YouTube.
95. Knit them a sweater each year and put “From The Weasleys” on the gift card.
96. When taking the stairs with them stop and insist that you have to wait because the staircases are moving.
97. When they turn off the lights, make a loud cracking sound and pretend to Apparate to the other side of the room.
98. Carry around a hip flask and refuse to drink anything they offer you.
99. Toss a small handful of dirt into their fireplace and yell "Diagon Alley!"
100. If you go to a train station with them, ask random people if they know where you can find Platform 9 3/4. Do this in an extremely fake British accent.
101. When your friend is checking sports scores, ask them if they can find out the score of the latest Quidditch match.
102. If they refuse, complain that you missed the semi-final match between the Chudley Cannons and the Wimpbourne Wasps and you need to know who will be advancing to the finals against the Tutshill Tornadoes.
103. At your next sleepover, draw a lightning-bolt scar on your forehead, and just as your friend is drifting off to sleep, grab your forehead and start screaming that you dreamed Voldemort killed your parents.
104. Insist that they go to a premiere with you and make sure they go.
105. Invite them to go somewhere with you, then go to a Harry Potter related party.
106. Throw them a surprise Harry Potter birthday party.
107. … invite their closest friends and family.
108. Reset their desktop picture to a Harry Potter one… constantly.
109. Put on a ridiculously patterned robe and tell them to get under it with you because it’s an Invisibility Cloak.
110. … sneak up behind them wearing it or follow them around.
111. Tell them that their favorite hat looks like Quirrell’s turban.
112. Change their ringtone to ‘Hedwig’s Theme'.
113. Make them a wand.
114. …Make yourself one, and when in public, take it out and attempt to teach them how to use it properly.
115. Buy them Harry Posters and demand them to put it on their wall.
116. Constantly ask them to name the 12 uses of dragon’s blood.
117. Ask them to play chess with you and ask them why their set is broken because the pieces don’t move.
118. Ask them if they would like a properly functioning one from Diagon Alley.
119. Make them Butterbeer or any other HP food.
120. Buy them the first book for their birthday or holiday.
121. If they don’t read it, steal it and rewrap it to regift it on another holiday.
122. Write “I must not tell lies” on their hand with a red pen if they fall asleep.
123. Steal all of their clothes and leave only a robe in their closet.
124. Write in all Harry Potter character’s birthdays or event dates on their calendars.
125. Ask them to celebrate random character’s birthdays with you.
126. Give them Wizard Wrock cds.
127. Add them to their iTunes and change the names of the songs to a popular one.
128. …Play them in public places, such as work.
129. Make them a daily calendar that features one quote from the books for everyday.
130. Ask them if they would go to London with you to find the Leaky Cauldron.
131. Buy them tickets to a Harry Potter convention. Make sure they go.
132. Invite them to go to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter with you.
133. Hack their iTunes account and subscribe them to every HP podcast you can find.
134. Ask them to help you assemble the Harry Potter Lego structures.
135. Mix a bunch of random ingredients from their kitchen together and tell them that you’re concocting a new potion. Demand that they try it.
136. After everything they say, add “Nice one, Hufflepuff.”
137. If you see them looking into a mirror, ask them what it depicts as their true desire.
138. Make up a story about an absurd dream that you had the night before and tell them that according to your dream dictionary, something terrible will happen to them.
139. Capture a beetle, put it in a jar, and demand that they guard it with their life so that “Rita doesn’t get away this time.” Refuse to explain.
140. If they are reading the newspaper, ask them to tell you about the latest updates on the Ministry of Magic.
141. Print this out and use it as a checklist!
Mischief Managed.(literally!)
Paige Cyrus